04-25-03 - 8:25 a.m.
so i'm back at my desk after my 19th nervous breakdown, an emotional meltdown that had me sobbing naked in a bathtub for two hours until my poor berries pulled the plug, literally, and calmly informed my staff; my mom won't be in for a few days- she's overworked and i'm now in charge.
pity the fool who doesn't clean the lint trap.
i have a chronic knot in my stomach. my heart feels hollow, like a rotting halloween pumpkin. no lighted candle. no perpetual grin. after three days of channel surfing and morbid self pity, i decided that i don't need a job or man to validate me, but the sum of all parts can be magical when it works. i also learned i have friends; beautiful, faceless soulmates who actually read this crap and care enough to let me know. thank you.